A White Man's Guide to Dating a Foxy Cleopatra

1. Never tell her you "aren't into white girls" or that you have a "thing" for women of color. No one wants to be the person to satisfy every one of your sick, weird, or nerdy fantasies.

2. Please, don't mess with the hair. Whether real or fake, human or horse, long or short, a black woman's hair is one of her most treasured possessions. Do not poke fun about it, do not ask her if she thinks it's safe to blow dry something that came out of a long plastic bag, and do NOT act surprised when you find out it is indeed real hair. Also reference Chris Rock's documentary Good Hair.

3. Do not tell her Kate Moss is your dream girl, even if she is. Women love feeling beautiful, and most of them will do a whole lot to attain that feeling. So unless you want your girl looking like Lil' Kim or the tranny hooker on 14th and Columbia, do not give her any reason to even consider going blonde.
4. Racial stereotypes just don't fly. Even if she started making fun of the lil' homies at the Quick Stop, it is never okay to join in. Don't ask her if black men really do have bigger penises...even if you're genuinely curious. And don't make fun of Latinos or Asians either. This will make her think that you are a closet-racist and one day you might unleash your claws on her. Homies stick together.
5. Be yourself...and be prepared. Don't pretend to know who Big Sean is if you really don't. I would also recommend staying away from shoes her noticeably cooler, better looking, blacker ex-boyfriend wore, such as Jordans or Air Forces. They will not make you look cooler, and they will make her look like just as big of a tool for dating you. Don't make fun of her if she tells you she remembers the death of Biggie & Tupac but not of Kurt Cobain...because black women are beautiful but our tempers are not!
LoveLatasha JamesComment